Let me start by saying thank you for reading this blog post. I know you have busy lives and I pray the few minutes you give to read these words will draw you closer to each other and to the Lord.
Sally and I just completed an online Marriage Mentors training course by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott. We respect this couple greatly and appreciate the decades of time they have put into the growth of tens of thousands of couples. Even before we knew about the course we were (and still are) using their devotional for couples at night.
One of the lessons in the course is titled “Making You Mundane Moments Count”. The point of the lesson was to be aware of common moments that couples experience on a daily basis and use those moments to connect and grow as a couple.
Frankly I LOVE this lesson and principle. Big events and wonderful experiences such as vacations, second honeymoons, weekends away, marriage seminars and the like are great and make fantastic memories. As my friend Kyle Pacetti likes to say “Major decisions are made at major events.” Kyle is correct. We experienced that recently when we attended a Personal Focus Retreat. But it’s the tasks that are performed every day, throughout the day, that shape our relationships and futures. It’s these mundane moments that make the major decisions turn into life and relationship growth.
In his book The Slight Edge author Jeff Olson explains it this way, “The things that you do every single day, the things that don’t look dramatic, the things that don’t even look like they matter, do matter. That they not only make a difference-they make all the difference.” On a side note this is a book that I highly recommend to anyone seeking to make changes in any area of their lives, especially in the area of personal and or business success.
In an vehicle, oil is used as lubrication between the parts so that friction does not tear down each individual part and cause the entire engine to seize up and fail. Kind words and gestures are the oil of relationships. This ‘oil’ should be applied regularly and liberally. Moving back to the lesson from the Parrotts they brought up several daily interactions.
On a scale of 1 to 5, 1 being Not Very Well and 5 being Extremely Well, rate how well you do each of these 5 common moments:
1) Saying good morning as you start each day.
2) Saying thanks for the common things each day.
3) Saying I understand.
4) Saying I Love You.
5) Saying hello when you greet each other at the end of each work day.
Think about these ‘mundane moments’. If you are doing well then great job! Keep it up! If you are missing one or more then make it a point to start today with improving your consistency.
It’s really does make a GREAT difference in the long-term happiness of your relationship. Small changes over time result in incredible growth! This is not Hard Work, it’s fun.
Challenge yourself to change your habits and I know you will love the results!
“Keep this book of the law always on your lips. Meditate on it day and night so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” -Joshua 1:8
I believe in you!