Stop Fighting

I don’t shy away from the tough topics here and I’m not afraid of conflict or pushback.  Here is another.  You should not be fighting with your spouse.  Ever.

Twice in the past few weeks my lovely bride and I have heard a message or read in a devotional that all couples fight and that couples who do not fight are somehow ‘not healthy’.  WRONG!

Before we go any further let me says this.  ALL couples will have differences of opinion.  There has been more than one time that my lovely bride and I found ourselves on opposite sides of an issue.  But we don’t fight.  Not ever.  We talked about this recently.  Neither of us could recall having a fight.  Maybe when we were first married, but not in the last couple of decades.

Cue the “Awwwww, how sweet, they are perfect.  Why isn’t MY marriage perfect?”  Dude.  We are far from perfect.  Seriously.  But raise my voice to that precious gift from God? Respond in anger to her?  Instill fear of me in her heart?  Not. Ever. Happening.

Guys, we are all adults here.  The truth is you don’t fight with people at work, you have self-control.  You don’t yell at the pastor when you disagree with a sermon point.  You show respect.  The person who deserves the most respect in your life is your wife!  For real.  She puts up with you…you are smelly, hairy, think a lot of yourself and don’t have a clue about women, but she loves you.
(Ok, maybe that smelly, hairy part is just for me :-))

The person who is closest to you in your life should be given the most regard, not the least regard.  We often think, “Well, I can let my guard down at home and just relax.  I can just be me and not worry about it.”

You can and should be “me”, as long as “me” is loving, kind, gentle and thoughtful.  If “me” is arrogant, condescending, demanding and self-centered then I suggest you be someone else.  Someone more like Jesus.  How do you pull that off?  Be in the Word every day.  Study it.  Meditate on it.  Pray for the Holy Spirit to be in you at all times and give you His self-control.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control; against such things there is no law.
-Galatians 5:22-23

You can do this!  I believe in you!