I’m going to lift your spirits…by talking about divorce. Oh yes I am!
Let me ask you a question. What percentage of marriages in the United States end in divorce?
I heard what most of you were thinking. The commonly quoted statistic is 50%. Based on that number anyone who gets married has a 50/50 chance of making it. Flip a coin, heads or tails, half of you who are currently married are going to split up. Based on the 50% statistic.
But is it true?
In a word, no. Multiple studies have shown that the divorce rate in the United States has never hit the 50% mark. In fact the highest rate ever actually calculated from raw numbers is 41% based on a New York Times article…and the rate has been declining since 1980. But even that number isn’t truly accurate. In fact according to initial research conducted in 2006 on first time marriages, “probably 20 to 25 percent have ended in divorce on average”. This is from Shaunti Feldhahn and her husband Jeff who have written a book called The Good News About Marriage. They spent several years pouring through the data related to marriage and divorce. Apparently the 50% value came from projections based on how the divorce rate was increasing through the 60s and 70s but the 50% never happened. It’s a myth.
In fact among all marriages for those who regularly attend church the rate is much lower, likely in the teens or single digits. For couples who pray together frequently the rate is less than 1 in 10,000.
The problem isn’t just that there is a false statistic believed by many, perhaps most married people. The problem is that believing a 50% divorce statistic leads to a sense of hopelessness. The idea that no matter what we do then we still only have a 50/50 shot of making it. But it is simply NOT TRUE.
If you are married or thinking about marriage then your chances of staying married, whether or not you are a Christian, are almost certainly above 60%. If you are a Christian and so is your spouse then your odds are likely above 80%. If you pray together regularly your odds are at LEAST 99.99%. This is the truth!!!
If together you make a commitment to a life-long marriage, you center your relationship on God, you take advantage of resources to grow and nurture your relationship then you WILL have a lifelong marriage. Furthermore if you know what love really is you can have an incredibly happy marriage. If you want to improve martial happiness, just click through the HappierHusband archives on the right side of this page and enjoy!
Love you all!