Category Archives: Money

How to a Have a Dynamic Marriage

Early this morning I was reading from the Gospel of Luke and in part of the passage the following words of Jesus were recorded, “And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.” – Luke 11:9-10

This is an important passage to me and many other Christians. It is Jesus teaching on the subject of persistence in prayer. Here Jesus teaches me to keep asking in prayer…even beyond when I feel like quitting. I’m learning and growing in this principle.

Before That

Even before reading that section of scripture I had already done a Joyce Meyer devotional based on Psalm 17:22 with the title, “A Happy Heart is Good Medicine.” Between the devotional and the passage above I watched two short (less than two minutes each) YouTube Christian motivational videos.

During the Day

While driving to the gym and work I listened to a podcast on how to grow an Internet business from Jeremy Frandsen and Jason Van Orden. During a couple of periods of down time I was reading the book, The Answer by John Assaraf. Oh! I almost forgot that I read two blog posts, one from Dan Miller called “Jobs Come and Go – But Beauty and Grace Continue” and “Stop Waiting to Make Perfect Decisions” by Jon Acuff.

A Bit of Sally’s Day

Today Sally spent time reading scriptures. She is also reading a wonderful book by Lysa Terkuerst titled, “Your Best Yes.” Like me she listened to a podcast Jeremy and Jason. She read the same blog posts from Jon Acuff and Dan Miller. Tonight we will take some quiet time together to do a devotional for married couples before we pray and go to sleep.

Both of us are regularly reading, listening to and or watching information that will help us grow personally. In addition we have written down goals and posted things we plan to do together.

What We Talk About

Do you know what we talk about? We talk about the normal things, jobs, money, what to have for dinner, our workouts, errands that must be run and groceries that must be purchased. Do you know what else we talk about? We talk about the exciting things we learned from watching, reading and listening. We talk about goals and dreams and specific plans to accomplish them.

The Result

We have some times where things are a bit down and challenging. But honestly all of the growing and sharing keeps our marriage fresh and new! As you probably already know Sally is my best friend. I love spending time with her, talking and sharing. In addition my greatest periods of growth have occurred because she helps me to move past obstacles. When I am at my weakest times I open my heart and she fills me with encouragement and hope. As she grows and learns she shares what she has discovered to help me grow. Not only our relationship but our finances and business plans are improved because of this continual personal and spiritual growth.

What About You?

Is your marriage a dynamic event? Do you and your spouse share about things you are learning and discovering during your personal times of study and growth? Or perhaps all of your conversations revolve around the mundane daily details of life. Now, those conversations are necessary. Dishes must be done, children must be chauffeured, meals must be made and clothes must be washed. But are you both, individually and as a couple, intentionally growing as you move throughout your days? Are you purposefully seeking out materials that will make you a stronger Christian, better spouse and parent, more efficient in your work or business, and learning better how to help others? If you are then let me applaud you! No kidding…I just applauded you out loud (good thing Sally isn’t here right now, she might think I’m losing it :-)).

It’s Time to Grow

If you aren’t growing and sharing about your growth it’s not hard to change. Start small, read a few passages in the Bible and ask the Lord to help you grow. Read at least 10 minutes a day in a book that will improve some aspect of your life. Instead of listening to sports, music or talk radio as you drive play a podcast or audio book to help you develop. Sit down and come up with a goal you would like to accomplish together and write it down. Take a few minutes at night to read a devotional and pray together. These activities can take an average marriage and turn it into one that is fun, intellectually stimulating, financially improving and spiritually powerful. They can give you the dynamic marriage you crave!

You can do it!

Love you all!

-Troy

Do the Hard Thing…You’ll Be Glad You Did

I feel I should preface this post with a note. It is different than a lot of what you have seen at HappierHusband. But sometimes you have to shake things up.

Did You Know?

Did you know that most people live paycheck to paycheck? I’m sure you did. Did you know that the median household income in the United States for 2009-2013 was $53,046? For a family of four (two children and two adults) that is almost $30,000 above the United States poverty level.

False Guilt

If you make more than $10,000 in your household per year then you are wealthier than most of the people in the world. You are RICH! Rolling in the bucks! You can buy pretty much anything you like because you make more money than billions of other people! (That was sarcasm, just in case you didn’t catch it.) Don’t fall for it. The truth is although you probably DO make more money than most people in the world you live in a part of the world where you pay more for products and services as well. Just because you make $30,000, $40,000, $50,000 or more you should not feel guilt for someone who lives in a different country but makes enough money to take care of their own family. I recently was speaking to a friend who lived in Asia for 8 months. She was lamenting the fact that when she returned to the US some items cost 4 times what they paid while they were out of the country. If you have enough money for safety, for shelter, for putting a little into savings and for helping others, then you are doing well…no matter the exact amount. Note that I didn’t mention tithing in that list. We shouldn’t count our tithe as income to be considered, as it is a gift back to God for His goodness to us.

A Personal Question

If you had a look at our family’s tax returns you’d say we are doing ok. But are we doing as well as we should be doing? I don’t mean should we be making millions of dollars per year (although there is nothing wrong with that as long as the money is used in accordance with God’s will and Biblical principles), I mean are we doing as well as we should with what God has provided? In other words are we being good stewards?

Why Americans Live Paycheck to Paycheck

I’m convinced there is a simple reason why so many American families find themselves under crushing debt loads and always living near the edge of financial ruin. A very simple reason. We don’t have a lack of money; we have a lack of a money plan. There is a cost to not having a plan for our finances and it’s not just a cost to us.

Imagine With Me

Imagine being able to anonymously send $1,000 to a family in your church that you know is in need.

Imagine being able to commit $30 per month to supporting a child in poverty in another country.

Imagine being able to plan and enjoy a cruise or a trip to Orlando with your family…and to bring along your child’s best friend at your expense.

Imagine taking an annual mission trip to the same place each year and making great relationships with the people in that area and bringing them to Jesus.

Imagine.

Counting the Cost

Do you know how much each of those imaginings would cost? Of course the first two are simple, but even the others are only a few thousand dollars. Now, I hear what you are probably thinking. “ONLY a few thousand dollars? Is he nuts? If I had a few thousand extra dollars I would be able to pay my way out of this mess!” My friend, you do have a few thousand dollars to spare…and so do I. They are wrapped up in going out to dinner every Sunday and buying clothes when we already have more than we wear. Those thousands of dollars are in a hundred little things we buy or waste over the course of each year. Maybe it’s time for a change.

The Simple Solution

There is a simple solution. It has three steps. But it also has a cost. The cost is self-discipline.

No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening–it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.

-Hebrews 12:11 NLT

Here are the steps: 1) Make a budget where you spend less than you take in. 2) Pay down your debts with the excess. 3) Stick to it.

There are many ways to make a budget; Dave Ramsey has an entire course used in many churches dedicated to it, Financial Peace University. If you don’t have the option to take the course then buy Dave’s book The Total Money Makeover. Right now he is offering a $33 deal on the entire Destroy Debt 2015 bundle. Those aren’t affiliate links, I won’t make a dime if you buy them but I just want you to know they are out there. If you can’t afford the books check with your pastor or local library.

Closing Thoughts

I want to be very clear. This should not be taken as license for one person in a marriage to control or overpower the other person’s ability to spend money. This must be a process worked out between the two of you where you both agree that steps need to be taken and changes need to be made. But like all critical aspects of marriage this process needs to be bathed in prayer and mutually supportive.

Life is tough, but if you are tough on yourself it will be infinitely easier on you.

-Zig Ziglar

If you commit to this path of self discipline then you’ll be happier in the long run. There will be challenges and unexpected expenses. There may be times when you blow it and have to jump back on. But imagine the satisfaction of know you are using the resources God has loaned to you in a way that is pleasing to Him and in a way that will allow you to live with less stress and to help others in need.

“Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

-Matthew 22:37-40

Love you all!

-Troy